This week, the trial began for the man accused of relentlessly tormenting Amanda Todd.
Aydin Coban pleaded not guilty to five criminal charges, including extortion, harassment and possession of child pornography.
Todd died by suicide in 2012. In a video she uploaded to YouTube prior to her death, she explained via flash cards that she’d been blackmailed by a man and it had resulted in bullying from peers.
Todd’s death rocked our country and the world. The viral video was shocking, sickening and captivating. At the time, I watched it several times, saddened at the young girl’s pain. When the video first went viral, my daughter was two years old, and I was 29.
Now, 10 years later, I see it differently. I have a 12-year-old daughter who spends time on the internet chatting with her classmates, scrolling TikTok and watching YouTube videos. Todd began being bullied when she was just 11 years old.
Coban, a Dutch man living in Europe, was extradited to sa国际传媒 for the trial. He allegedly had dozens of accounts that he used to torment Todd, and he humiliated her by connecting with her classmates, teachers and parents.
It’s common knowledge that cyber crimes can be very difficult to prosecute, and the distance between jurisdictions can play a major role. The anonymity of the internet makes things even more difficult.
About a year ago, I watched a newsmagazine program on Todd’s story on YouTube. I was stunned, and I was already familiar with the story. The next day, I had my daughter sit down and watch it with me.
I often talk about how glad I am that social media wasn’t around when I was a teen. I would be horrified if my teenage years were uploaded to the web. I know what I would have posted and it’s things that I wouldn’t be proud of now.
We have all made poor choices as teenagers. Who am I kidding? Each of us still makes poor choices from time to time.
Men who stalk, harasses and sexually exploit young girls and women are causing substantial damage. This trial could set precedents on cases such as this one.
We need serious action to be taken against these predators. Someone halfway around world hiding behind a screen needs to know that a crime is a crime. And children need to be protected — they are going to make mistakes. That is a part of life.
Another infuriating part of the story was the fact a topless image of Todd was shared with all of her classmates via Facebook. Coban, allegedly, made fake social media accounts with false photos, adding classmates, teachers and parents in the school as “friends.” Once several hundred people were “friends” with the account, the profile photo was changed to the underage Todd’s topless image.
Todd was not only being tormented by a man across the world, she was being tormented by her peers.
This was the big learning piece for me as a parent. I want my daughter to know that if she ever sees something like this happening in her school or peer group, she needs to stand with the individual and not against them. They are a victim, and we need to make sure that is clear, each and every time.
These types of things are not only happening to young women. A middle-aged man shared a story with me about an online encounter where a woman asked him to send a revealing photo. He thought he was in a consensual situation.
Moments later, the photo was sent back to him with a request for money or the photo would be shared with everyone on his friend list.
When he told me this, we started talking about Todd. She was so young when she was dealing with the unthinkable.
For any adult, it would be a horrific and humiliating ordeal. If we, as adults, couldn’t handle it, what can we expect a child to do?
