To be eligible for a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame nomination, acts must have put in at least 25 years of work.
Seems fair enough - so why is heaps of hate directed at the nominating committee each year?
Because these folks appear to be largely out of touch.
Included in the class of 2013 (which was announced last week) are some solid first-time nominees, including Rush, Deep Purple, N.W.A, Public Enemy and Albert King.
But here's where things get interesting. Those musical acts are on the nomination ballot alongside a core of all-stars - Heart, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts and Randy Newman - who were eligible in years prior but deemed not worthy enough.
Huh?
Give credit to organizers for reaching out to disgruntled fans, who are being encouraged for the first time to cast votes of their own at rockhall.com. That's all well and good, but I'm proposing we take this schmozzle one step further.
The list of inductees already in Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is riddled with holes. My suggestions below attempt to fill them.
1. In: Kiss. Out: LaVern Baker. Detroit rock veterans Kiss have been eligible for inclusion since 1999, yet they remain off the ballot - despite worldwide record sales of 100 million copies. R&B singer LaVern Baker, on the other hand, was voted into the hall in 1991, despite never having a No. 1 single on the pop charts. Hmmm.
2. In: Yes. Out: Little Willie John. Is it important to recognize the fathers of rock 'n' roll? Absolutely. And in that regard, inductee Little Willie John certainly qualifies. But doing so at the expense of pioneering progrockers Yes is a crime against rock 'n' roll. Period.
3. In: Iron Maiden. Out: Moonglows. This I will not stand for. How does short-lived yet groundbreaking doo-wop group the Moon-glows make it in when one of the true pioneers of British heavy metal has yet to pass muster with voters? The Moonglows were together as a unit for six years. After more than 30 years together, Iron Maiden continues to be a force in metal, drawing record crowds to this day. Case closed.
4. In: Journey. Out: Percy Sledge. Any time you throw When a Man Loves a Woman on the stereo, good times are sure to follow. The same could be said of Don't Stop Believin', one of six Top 10 hits for Journey. The stats just don't compare. Journey has a longer, better career.
5. In: Slayer. Out: The Flamingos. Slayer is second only to Metallica in terms of American metal music pioneers, which alone should have earned it entry into the hall. The Flamingos were doo-wop royalty in name only (17 members passed through the ranks of the group, which splintered into numerous sub-sets). Talk about a no-brainer.
6. In: The Cars. Out: Lloyd Price. In the early 1950s, Lloyd (Mr. Personality) Price had a series of hits, but after 1959's I'm Gonna Get Married had left the charts he suffered a two-decade dry run. The Cars may not have had the influence of Price, but they certainly had a memorable 15-year run on the charts. More importantly, they helped bring new wave to the mainstream - a key role in the evolution of rock.
7. In: The Moody Blues. Out: The Dells. Much like Genesis - which is in - the Moody Blues are part of the progrock pantheon. How they remain out while doo-wop act the Dells are long since in is perplexing. Forget that the Dells went 50 years without a personnel change. The Moody Blues created Days of Future Passed, for crying out loud.
8. In: The Monkees. Out: Del Shannon. Here's where things get tricky. Do you put in a group like the Monkees (a TV creation that had a considerable amount of talent) at the expense of someone like Del Shannon, who had precisely one (albeit very big) hit song? I say you do. And since I'm the one rewriting history for the purpose of this column, Shannon has to to run, run, run, run, run, run away.
9. In: Mot脙露rhead. Out: Little Anthony and the Imperials. One of Little Anthony and the Imperials' biggest soul hits was I'm On The Outside (Looking In). Funny. That's what it must feel like for rock legend Lemmy and his beloved power trio.
10. In: Dick Dale. Out: Duane Eddy. If we're talking course-altering impact, few guitarists can match that of Dick Dale, the surf-guitar king whose playing took the idea of epic volume and cranked it to 11. Eddy had some hits of his own, including Rebel Rouser and Peter Gunn, but Dale's role in bringing guitar virtuosity to the fore is undeniable. Eddy's out.
